Easy Toddler Sleep Training Tips That Work

Easy Toddler Sleep Training Tips That Work

If you ask any parent, they will probably tell you that getting a toddler to sleep can sometimes feel like trying to scale a mountain while appropriately outfitted. It’s not just getting your child to bed that wears you out; requests for ‘just one more story!’ or ‘I need a drink of water!’ can test even the most patient parents. Sleep training is that lifeline that not only teaches your little one to drift off into dreamland on their own but also rewards you with precious evening hours. So, let’s talk about how to help your toddler get to the point where they are natural nighttime ninjas.

What is Toddler Sleep Training?

Training toddlers to sleep is akin to building a routine that helps them understand it is time to wind down for the night. I have been guilty of wanting to be a sweet, soft, loving parent by giving extra cuddles and rights before bed, or even during the night when the child is not fully quieted yet. However, I also realize that empowering the child to sleep on their own is a much healthier and longer-lasting state to maintain. A wonderful method to initiate the adventure of sleep is to establish a regular time for your child to go to bed. The ideal window is between 7:30 and 8:30 PM. Toddlers truly are creatures of habit; we use the term “routine” for them because it is so applicable. They find comfort in it, and they perform better (and are generally more pleasant to be around) when they are ensconced in it. It is at times like these when they buy into the routine, and they go willingly, with no fight at all, into the adventure of sleep.

Why is sleep training important for toddlers?

Training toddlers to sleep is a significant tool for parents to have in their toolkit. The main reason is that sleep is so incredibly necessary for toddlers. It is essential for their growth, both physically and brain-wise. It is crucial for their health, and it is the best defense for their immune system. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that toddlers have a total of 11 to 14 hours of sleep, blending together nighttime slumber and naps.

When little ones are fully rested, their moods are generally better, which tends to lead to fewer tantrums and complaints. A decent night’s sleep often means a happier child, which fosters a more peaceful home environment. Sleep is so essential to the developing brain. It’s during slumber that the brain goes through a sort of rewind, asking, ‘What have I done today?’ and ‘What have I learned today?’ before moving on to a ‘What comes next?’ phase. Well-rested toddlers not only remember more, but they’re also more eager to climb, scramble, and explore as they discover ‘What comes next?

Sleep training teaches toddlers to fall asleep on their own, which fosters not only their self-confidence but also their independence. It gives them a sense of security and signals that it is time to wind down and get ready for sleep. It also fosters an all-around calming environment for both toddlers and parents. More often than not, parents wake up refreshed, which allows them to move through their daily tasks with ease.

When toddlers learn to soothe themselves to sleep, it shows that they can, in fact, train their brains to sleep.

When is the right time to start sleep training a toddler?

The perfect time to start sleep training your toddler is, according to a majority of child-raising specialists, at the age of 18 months to 2 years old. Here is why: Toddlers usually know the idea of “bedtime” by this age. They can already do some small tasks, so they can follow directions that make the “training” part of sleep training much lighter. Besides, nearly all the 18 – month -old kids have a vocabulary of up to a half-dozen words. They can now express wants and needs a little more clearly, which, with some leeway, gives the bedtime routine a hint of order. By the time most toddlers reach two years old, their morning nap will be something of the past. A morning nap, if they take one, is usually quite short, enabling them to possibly take a slightly longer afternoon nap later. 18 months is also a good age to start or continue sleep training, as it sets a schedule that can last from the “terrible twos” stage to preschool. Always remember that each child has a distinct personality, and it is necessary to be attentive to their behavior. If your child refuses to sleep or displays signs of excessive self-reliance, this might be a good time to start. Have patience, do not change your strategy, and follow your instincts as a parent. You will be victorious!

Which sleep training methods work best for toddlers?

While the sleep training process focuses on the child, let’s admit it—it’s about the child and the parent. So, not surprisingly, the sleep training process is also a learning experience for both parties. I’m pleased to present here some well-tested strategies for sleep training that I think may suit some of you.

Ferber method: The process of sleep training a toddler is, for many parents, a necessity not learned through mere trial and error. The most commonly successful methods fall into the “let them cry, but not too much or too long” category. The Ferber Method is one of the oldest and best-known techniques – often said to have earned its place alongside the first steps of the tango in the “classic dance of parenting.” Named after Dr. Richard Ferber, the author of a renowned sleep-training book, this method asks parents to put their babies or toddlers to bed awake and then to leave the room. If it isn’t going very well (i.e., your toddler is screaming at the top of their lungs), you go back in after a few minutes (don’t count it as “time out,” and don’t breathe a sigh of relief—you need to go in calmly and quietly). Then you repeat the process, adding a few minutes to your interval and using your best patient ear to tolerate the amount of noise coming from the other room.

Chair Method: The Chair Method is about helping them gradually learn to fall asleep on their own. Here’s how it goes: You start sitting right next to them while they settle down for the night. You could read them a story, sing some soft songs, or cuddle for just a few minutes. Each night, slide your chair a bit farther from the child’s bed. Ideally, you want to end up in the hallway, close to the door, letting the child know you are nearby and they are safe. This allows you to give the child space while they get used to sleeping alone and also lets you stay on “duty” for a little while longer. This method might seem slow and even a bit silly, but it’s a wonderful way to help a child feel secure while also teaching them to have confidence in themselves and their ability to sleep alone. Patience is a prime virtue in this method, but so too is love. And really, isn’t that what we all want when we settle down for sleep?

Pick Up, Pick Down: If your little one is between 9 and 18 months and is having trouble sleeping, the Pick Up, Pick Down method might ease the nighttime struggles. The Pick Up, Pick Down method comes highly recommended by the “Baby Whisperer,” Tracy Hogg. It is simple enough that anyone can do it, and it is gentle enough that your little one shouldn’t end up feeling traumatized by bedtime. The method essentially involves you picking up your toddler when they are crying and then putting them down once they have calmed down. This way they learn that it is acceptable to be in the crib and, over time, learn to self-soothe and achieve sleep.

Bedtime Fading: Is your toddler having difficulty falling asleep? Instead of sticking to a strict bedtime, try easing into it instead. Watch for those oh-so-obvious signs of impending sleep, like yawning or rubbing their eyes. When you notice one of those signs, that’s your cue to start the winding down process. It might take a little longer for your child to actually fall asleep, but this no-rush approach is good for you and your child. Once you both get the hang of it, you can start pushing the time back a bit.

Cry It Out Method: The cry-it-out approach is one of the hardest for me to accept, but I must admit it really works in many situations. The technique is simple, even if it does seem harsh. You put your child down to sleep and then leave the room. If they cry, you wait a short time and then go back in. The most important thing about this method is that you do not pick up or comfort your child during this process. Yet how can it be even halfway decent to let your child cry for more than a couple of minutes? How could this possibly be something that works? Well, here is how?

You should tell your little one: “Mommy loves you, my baby, but it’s time to sleep since the day is done. Sweet dreams,” then leave. After that, stay quiet outside for five minutes. If they keep crying, wait 10 more minutes before coming in to check on them, and add 5 minutes to your wait time for each subsequent time you have to check in. Continue this until your toddler has gone to sleep.

Gentle Method: The gentle technique is about so much more than just what it says in the name. It really is an art of sorts—an art of knowing when to move forward and when to pull back if your child is not ready for the next step. While not for every family, this method can be very effective and lovely and is what my husband and I used with our daughter. Here are the basics: You start with a child who is completely dependent on you for sleep and gradually introduce the idea that they can sleep without your physical presence. You are along for the ride, but your child is learning how to travel that route on their own. A key part of the gentle technique is that your child never feels frightened or abandoned, that they are safe and secure. And no one is ever in a rush; this is a thing that takes time.

Regardless which method you choose, be it the Cry It Out method or some other approach—you need to be sure of two things: first, that your toddler is truly ready for the transition, and second, that you are committed to the process every single night, at least as long as the method you’re using dictates. There are many different ways to go about sleep training, but the most important aspect to remember is that you’re doing something that you believe will help your child learn to sleep independently.

What is a realistic sleep training timeline for my toddler?

Are you poised to enter the jungle of sleep training for the first time with your little one? One of the first things to do is draw up a real schedule because let’s be honest, we all want to know the soonest we can go to sleep.

At first, the nights are a bit chaotic. Some methods are more straightforward and tend to yield faster results—like the direct “Cry It Out” method, which tends to take three to five nights, maximum, to work. While others take longer but are gentler. The “bedside” method is one of these. “Bedside” as in, you sit beside your toddler’s bed until they drift off to sleep. Easy, right? Well, it’s as easy as pie if you’ve got seven or eight weeks to burn.

The Ferber method can potentially yield results within a week, while gentler methods, such as the chair method, might not show results for a month or longer. If your toddler struggles after a few weeks, feel free to try a different method. Every child is different and may need a different method to reach their destination of sleeping through the night.

How do I handle night waking during sleep training?

Dealing with a baby who wakes up during the night while you are sleep training is difficult, but it’s just part of the process. Here are some friendly nighttime tips to help you cope.

When it comes to bedtime and nighttime parenting, my best advice is to be consistent. The method you choose doesn’t have to be perfect, but it will work best if you work it well. Think of your child as an audience getting to know a new show. The “better” the “show” is in the first few nights, the more likely you’ll stay on their top 10. If they know the routine and trust it, that’s half the battle won.
If you really must respond to their vocalizations, keep it cool and collected. A soft voice or gentle touch can communicate reassurance without overstimulating. If they awaken and cry, give it a moment before you tend to them. Sometimes, just a bit of time helps them get back to sleep. You can also remind them that it’s not morning yet, and they should still be in sleep mode. Allow your little one to learn the skill of self-soothing.
Avoid bright lights and don’t turn any part of the space into an engaging arena. Encourage your toddler to think of their sleep platform as optimized for sleeping only.
A nighttime routine that’s as structured as the day has a better chance of carrying over into the future. So, if you tend to the sleepy little person on a somewhat regular basis, that’s a vice you can continue.
Just being there is so reassuring for your toddler. They know you’re close by, and it really helps them when they’re working through their not-so-easy-to-resolve feelings. Just knowing you’re there helps them feel secure. Patience is essential during these nighttime wake-ups.

It’s normal for toddlers to wake up at night. This phase can be tough, but remind yourself that it won’t last forever. And remember: what we’re building during the 2- to 1-year transition is a pretty solid win in the foundation for sleep.

Simple Tips for Toddler Sleep Training

Even if I have an enthusiastic little one who brings me so much joy, I still can see how tough it can be to get them to wind down and go to bed. Here are some easy tips to make the sleep transition smoother for everyone involved.

Create an enjoyable and magical nighttime routine that your toddler looks forward to every day. A warm and soothing bath followed by the enchantment of a story and snuggles with Mom or Dad can help ease your toddler into the idea that it’s time to wind down.

Keep the lights low and the noise of the day at bay. Is there a special stuffed animal or blanket that your little one can’t sleep without? If so, hand that item over to them as you tuck them in.

You should also consider this: screen time should ideally be eliminated for at least two hours before bed. After dinner is a good time to transition into quieter activities, like coloring or puzzles.

Of course, during the day, it is a must to let them run wild, playing as much as possible until all that endless energy is finally spent.

Look for cues that your child is feeling drowsy, such as yawning or rubbing their little eyes. Plan to have them in bed around 7:30 or 8:00 p.m. to leave adequate time for them to drift off without having a mini-meltdown from being overtired.

When it’s time for bed, speak softly and sweetly to create a peaceful environment. If your little one is fussy, try your best to keep them calm and continue as if it’s just another normal bedtime. Try not to offer too much in the way of physical comfort. The hugs can come tomorrow.

Sometimes, bedtime can get disrupted because of things like travel or teething. When this happens, get back to your usual routine as soon as you are able.

When your toddler sleeps a little better or manages bedtime nicely, take the time to notice and celebrate it. This whole sleep thing is a learning process, not just for them but for you, too!

It is so important that you are getting enough rest as well. When you are well-rested, your patience with your toddler is increased tenfold, and that is an essential ingredient when sleep training. Don’t be afraid to enlist help from your partner, family, or friends.

If all of this feels overwhelming, talk to your pediatrician or a sleep expert for help.

Every child is one of a kind, so settling on a sleep schedule for your toddler may take some doing. But with a little perseverance and a lot of love, you can arrive at a plan that works best for your family.

Can I sleep train my toddler for naptime?

Getting your little one ready for naptime can be just like getting them ready for bedtime. Here are some straightforward suggestions:

Keep the schedule the same every day.
Make the room dark and quiet.
Have the same “rules” every day.

It’s wonderful when little kids can learn to soothe themselves to sleep, leaving them content and still. But getting them to nap can prove maddening. My daughter, for example, had a pretty solid, twice-a-day napping schedule until she turned two. By 25 months, she was completely done with napping. We literally tried everything to keep the nap alive. We failed, and our doctor told us it was normal to fail. When it comes to getting toddlers to sleep, keep in mind that there’s a difference between teaching them to fall asleep at night and getting them to take a daytime sleep. The good news is that nighttime sleep can usually be improved. The not-so-good news is that naptime may not get better as they get older. It’s definitely okay if your little one is 3 and still doesn’t take a perfect nap every day.

Can I sleep train my toddler at age 2?

You can definitely train a 2-year-old to sleep well. Sleep training a toddler is quite different from training an infant. Toddlers can express their wishes quite vocally and quite well. And they can also get out of their beds and come to you, which makes “toddler sleep training” a bit trickier, but not impossible. Still, training a 2-year-old to sleep is well within the range of possibility. Two is not too young to learn the skill of sleeping without you nearby. Bedtime can be special! It can be a time to read stories or special books, or to listen to soft music. These transitions can help a little one to know it is time to settle down. A parent’s role is really important here. Staying kind but firm when a child tests the boundaries of bedtime as a routine is key. Some gentle reminders can help reinforce the idea that this time of day is special and that it comes with some rules.